We’re looking forward to co-hosting tonight’s #BEaLEADER Twitterchat as @PrPinkPonies/@PrettyPinkPro and our networks from Meetup.com, Etsy, USC et al…
“How do you manage people who are better than you?”
There Is An I In Team: HBR Presentation w/ Mark De Rond and Angela Herrin
I listened to a recent web presentation provided by the Harvard Business Review titled, “There Is An I In Team”.
I’m fascinated by collaboration among team members as a result of having had a couple of long term boyfriends who played Division I sports (Hot!).
It made very little sense to me in college that men can experience anger and frustration with a teammate or rival, duke it out, then grab a beer and hang out as friends the following day.
They seemed to be able to separate their roles on their teams from who they are off the team. But, how?!?!?
These abilities — a) getting over setbacks and moving forward, and b) separating one’s role on and off his/her team — are paramount to one’s chances of success in large organizations (i.e. Professor Xavier’s school for the gifted, or if you prefer reality, large world class corporations).
The HBR presentation I mentioned is one of the better studies on how the best teams function, what makes teams effective, and how to manage teams to accomplish wins. De Rond takes his observations of university rowing teams and boat races to examine coordination between team members.
One insightful observation De Rond discovered in the results of team surveys is that high performers typically underestimate their own teammates**. And, as we all have experienced, this makes high performers or those who are highly intelligent dismissive of others.
If this is true, what can we do to exploit the value high performers can provide while mitigating the risks these high performers’ behavioral tendencies often cause?
Surprisingly, the answer isn’t found by forcing all team members to get along. It turns out that expressing emotional experiences and venting to teammates create winning performance***.
While most of us define team harmony as an absence of competitiveness between members, this is only half of the story. Competition (“lack of harmony”) cannot truly be forced out of individuals because it is innate. If suppressed, competition resurfaces in more destructive forms under the radar of team leaders and creates more dysfunction than if they were acknowledged, accepted and resolved in a psychologically safe and moderated space.
My favorite take away from this presentation is this:
Harmony cannot be forced in teams. Harmony is created naturally when teams experience wins and achieve great things through collaboration with one another.
Despite Coca-Cola’s several collaborations with designers and artists to produce fresh bottle images, it’s preeminent brand signature — the shape of its bottle — is never out shined.
I’m often cut off mid-sentence and asked, “But..what do you wanna do?”.
Fair enough question.
(SPOILER: There are no images in this post)
It isn’t as if I responsibly mapped out my professional trajectory like I was taught to do…Instead, I followed my heart (whatever that means) and learned important lessons along the way. But, that doesn’t help clarify things, does it?
How silly was I to add “passion” to the bulletpoints on my resume? The entire Dalek population would explode attempting to grasp this concept.
That said, using a wordcloud tool has failed to capture the essence of the value I can add to any organization – instinct, experience, heart, loyalty, intuition, perserverance, empathy, connection, et al…These terms are not trending on LinkedIn — Google alerts would’ve informed me, and I just checked.
So, since my unorthodox list of accomplishments are invisible to search engines (and, incomprehensible to Daleks), I decided to explicity define “success” for myself as a courtesy to my new friends and acquaintances.
Here is what my point B looks like:
*You’re having your A.M. coffee while reading about the biggest networking event of the year on a page in the WSJ.
(Blurb for one of many well-known international events)
The text reads:
Notable Speakers include:
Abby Joseph Cohen one of the most respected figures in investing circles and is the chief US investment strategist for Goldman Sachs Group, Inc.
Anna Wintour, Editor-in-Chief, Vogue
Carrie Fisher, Actress best known as Princess Leia
Sarah Blakely, CEO & Founder, Spanx
Genevieve Bos, Founding Publisher, Pink Magazine
Sheila Kahanek, former Accountant, Enron.
I hope that helped clarify some things for you.
Have a great weekend!!!
*end scene;P(SPOILER: To be continued…)
“The beauty [of Los Angeles] is the beauty of letting things go; letting go of where you came from; letting go of old lessons; letting go of what you want for what you are, or what you are for what you want; letting go of so much—and that is a hard beauty to love.”—Michael Ventura, “Grand Illusion”Letters at 3 AM: Reports on Endarkenment
Bridget is a friend, mentor, inspiration, advisor, twitter follower, confidante, et cetera…
I learned a lot about self-acceptance from Bridget’s writing advice during my years as an undgrad (and afterwards).
As it turns out, writers view words as instruments by which individuals connect to others. I learned that writing can be formatted in any way as long as the message and the spirit of the message are successfully transported to another — carrying with it the essence of its source.
Writing is a vehicle.
And, unlike perfectly formatted bullets on a memo, the musings of a good writer isn’t only concerned with getting you to point B –– she wants to take you on a ride!!!
Congrats on your beautiful book, B. And, thanks for the ride.
So you still think style’s just a bunch of fluff?
Katy Perry’s photographs by Jannson in Interview mag beg to differ.
When you’re in the media’s eye and every step you take is scrutinized, publicized and tweeted, it’s tough to create a brand without your audience’s approval and agreement. It could be even harder to break out of your teeny-bopper persona … unless you’ve got the right tools and strategy to to make your desired new message clear.
The photographs of Katy Perry below successfully reposition the celebrity and communicates a clear message. What’s the message???
Take me seriously; I’m a talented and professional performer.
(Blk/Wht Photography by MIKAEL JANSSON)
#3PCstyle details: https://myprettypinkponies.files.wordpress.com/2012/04/3pcstyle.pdf
Join our Twittter/Pinterest conversation with Fashion Designer, Lando Ortega tonight at 6:30 (PT).
Lando provides us with his expert opinion on the following:
- Does fashion or style matter? Why/Why not?
- What kind of impact does styling and fashion have on women?
- How do we dress for who we really are (vs. who we wish to be) – body type, fit, style, fabric, drape…?
Please feel free to interject with follow up questions and thoughts after our guest has responded to the current question. Thank you!!!
Resources: Edith Head's How to Dress for Success Sasha Charnin Morrison's Secrets of Stylists: An Insider's Guide To Styling The Stars
Below is a link to the recent #HBRchat (Twitter discussion forum) with Harvard Business Review.
This popular weekly chat is moderated by @HBRexchange. One of the more engaging chats on Twitter.
If you have a moment to follow the transcript from yesterday’s chat to see how it works, we’ve provided a link below.
Yesterday’s chat was especially interesting in that everyone had varying perspectives on whether or not and how much rivalry affects productivity in professional teams. Good exchange by all.
Have a wonderful weekend!!!
HBR Twitter chats: #HBRchat
— HBR Exchange (@HBRexchange) April 27, 2012
What 3P had to say:@UneFrancofille @MikePWeiss re: competition should stay “on the field”. Separate professional from personal. #HBRChat
Rivalry is selfish; Your responsibility is to do what’s best for your entire team — not undermine it. #HBRChat
@svsashank : #Agreed. Leaders are obligated to create a culture of professionalism and integrity. #HBRChatHBR:Workplace rivalries can be so destructive, it’s not enough to simply ignore, sidestep, or attempt to contain them. Instead, effective leaders must turn rivals into collaborators—strengthening their positions, their networks, and their careers in the process. In fact, it’s important to think of these relationships not as chronic illnesses you have to endure but as wounds that must be treated in order for you to lead a healthy work life.
This week’s #HBRchat is based on the HBR article “Make Your Enemies Your Allies” by Brian Uzzi and Shannon Dunlap. http://hbr.org/2012/05/make-your-enemies-your-allies/ar/1
Q1. Have destructive workplace rivalries affected your career? How?
Q2. How can you redirect a rival’s negative feelings towards you?
Q3. Have you ever had success working with a one-time rival or seen others?
Here’s the link to HBR’s chat, Turn Your Enemies into Allies: http://storify.com/hbrexchange/hbrchat-topic-april-26-turn-your-enemies-into-all
|“Cool, Determined and Under 30” (via Inc. magazine)|
Tonight we met inspiring local entrepreneurs who create and sell handmade goods via their online store on Etsy. These Los Angeles creatives utilize technology and the platform provided by Etsy to lead teams of like-minded sellers.
We don’t necessarily think about the handmade goods seller when the word “entrepreneur” is used, however, these small business owners aren’t sitting around bedazzling for nothing — they make it rain!
Stay tuned for more feedback and some background on the L.A. – based Etsy Entrepreneurs in an upcoming post!
I often revisit this conversation between Malcolm Gladwell and television journalist, Robert Krulwich where they discuss what defines a “genius”.
This conversation looks at the following topics and questions:
- Is it “good” to segregate the superstars from the average stars?
- What makes Tiger “Tiger Woods”?
- What if it was a rule that we couldn’t ask one another from which university we graduated?
- What is the “selection effect”?
- Is our education system “…run like a modeling agency”?
(If you don’t have a flash player, please use this link to view the interview. Thanks for stopping by.)
We chatted tonight with Jeff Rickard (@RickardonSports) for tips and tools from the world of sports.
This is an ongoing discussion we encourage others to discuss. Here’s the link:
#3pcwin TweetChat at: http://tweetchat.com/room/3pcwin
Seize each opportunity!!
You were known as a focused player who wasn’t very personable. Did that hurt your career?
Well, it had a negative effect on how I was portrayed. But I had no one to explain the value of public relations to me. When I was in college, there was such an intense demand from the press that John Wooden said they couldn’t talk to me at all. So that was what I took for normal going into the NBA. Being at the top of my game and working as hard as I could for the people who employed me—that was my primary focus, and everything else was secondary. So I didn’t always respond to social situations in a pleasant way. When it came to talking to people, I was kind of reserved. But shyness is something you have to overcome. Later in my career, I started doing a lot better relating to fans and talking to the media. I think that’s continued to improve in my retirement.
Excellent interview with Kareem Abdul-Jabbar and Harvard Business Review. This interview highlights elements of success and transcends industries beyond sports. We continue to explore lessons from athletes on tonight’s #3PChat with @RickardonSports. Please follow and ask questions using “#3PCwin”. Thank you.
This interview discusses:
- Why PR matters in addition to your team’s results.
- What role managers play in development.
- Being multi-dimensional
- How to play with Magic.
- How being described as “difficult” hurts your game.
- Improvement in general.
- Being accessible.
- How to market and sell yourself.
- Et cetera…
We highly recommend this interview with Kareem as he reflects on his trajectory as he evolved from a great player to a winning player on and off court:
“To love is to risk not being loved in return. To hope is to risk pain. To try is to risk failure, but risk must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing.”
Leo F. Buscaglia
Wishing everyone a beautiful week!
Why have we become afraid of conversation…intimacy…relationships???
Poignant and sad perspective re: how we are being shaped by technology by psychologist, Sherry Turkle.
I receive applicable and straightforward career advice by listening to the Manager Tools, LLC podcast.
One of the topics I found most useful is what hosts, Mark and Mike, refer to as “behavioral diversity”. In simple terms, behavioral diversity refers to the concept that our tendencies are some combination of four broad categories represented by the letters D,I,S & C in the DiSC model.
I won’t go into DiSC theory here as it is lengthy and there are better resources of information for this behavior identification model. You also have to take a test to better understand your own behavioral profile.
That said, if you’re already somewhat familiar with DiSC, the outline we provide in this post (below) of the basic behavior types may serve as a useful communication reference guide.
As Mark often says (via Drucker, perhaps), “communication is what the listener does”.
Meg & the Ponies
Please note: the DiSC information was published and is owned by
© 2012 Manager Tools, LLC. All rights reserved
The piece attached in this post was produced by RHR International (@RHRIntlLLP), an organization dedicated to improving the performance of individuals, teams and business organizations.
We find the study to be unique in that RHR uses quantitative research and analysis to better understand how internal experiences are demonstrated in outward the leadership behavior of women in executive levels.
“We explored the internal psychological processes and resources of women leaders – “their inside,”
and how that interacts with “the outside” to create the experience of being a woman leader.”
Link to the article: Executive-Women-Leadership
Know what occurred to me earlier? Kindness isn’t always expressed in a pleasant sounding voice. Sometimes it’s disappointing when someone makes a decision that’s for our own best interest.
“…it takes thirty years to mature emotionally,…”
Can love improve mental and physical health and aid in our response to pain?
Can love make us wiser?
Included in this post is a link to an interesting piece by Diane Ackerman on a new field in science, interpersonal neurobiology (in other words, the science of relationships).
The fundamental idea of interpersonal neurobiology draws its vigor from one of the great discoveries of our era: that the brain is constantly rewiring itself based on daily life.
What we pay most attention to defines who we are — physically altering our brains…
The article argues that how one chooses to spend the hours in our lives literally shapes our physical selves.
When I worked full time in corporate America, I was always polished and groomed at the office. I worked in an environment where presentation and details made a huge impact on the perception of one’s sense of professionalism.
That said, it was always so refreshing to become “un-pretty” during weekends.
What does it mean to be “un-pretty”? First, let’s take a look at what “pretty” means:
I define ‘pretty’ as being polite, pleasant and polished. “Pretty” is the very essence of being a lady — coiffed hair, a manicure, a poise presentation, warm, approachable and socially graceful. (Think of a house party’s hostess – friendly and sociable). Someone “pretty” offers you coffee and cookies when you visit their homes. The “pretty” girl tells you how great you look (to simplify the concept); she is concerned about whether or not you’re comfortable and considers what your preferences are.
When I use the term “un-pretty”, I’m not implying that I made an effort to look unattractive (although, a lot of times, this was the case). What I mean is, my style of presentation was less ladylike and lacked the polish and niceties one would expect from a pageant-trained woman.
How does one achieve a “pretty” look?
Feminine make up highlighting the shape of one’s eyes + full lips + groomed brows and hairstyle + polished ready-to-face-the-camera style + tailored and put-togehter – any piece of hair out of place
I love the “un-pretty” side of my closet as much as the polished and tailored pieces I own. It’s necessary, at times, to wear wrinkled shirts, athletic shoes, cotton tees and unruly hair. I say this because I think it’s an advantage to be comfortable even without having to project the socially-constructed version of “girl”. You can be attractive in various ways — wearing pearls and a tiara or sneakers and a baseball cap.
To me, an un-pretty style can convey the gritty sexiness of Marlon Brando’s Stanley Kowalski.
Un-pretty means dressing with style without having to make a lot of effort — in So Cal this laid-back style is one that many non- L.A. natives try very hard to emulate. It’s the confidence in one’s self without having to look like a doll who took two hours to apply make up.
It’s an image that actors and models (who spend their working days in full make-up) naturally have on their days off. A look that conveys the understanding that if they wanted to, they could very well shave their scruff and be as pretty as they come. The “unpretty” girl doesn’t necessarily say ‘please’ or ‘thank you’ in a bubbly voice. She may give you a smirk or a nod of acknowledgement if she’s pleased with you.
Simplified, the “unpretty” girl asks you for a smoke without taking into consideration whether or not you approve of her smoking. She is not as self-conscious as her socially-graceful “pretty” girl counterpart.
How does one achieve this un-pretty too-cool-to-care style?
“undone hair” + cotton tee + element of relaxed or athletic gear – bubbly persona – string of pearls – “matchy-matchy” accessories + grit + attitude…
Beautiful Magdalena de la Cruz breezed through Berkeley and built an empire selling designer water. She’d never felt awkward or unattractive… until she moved to Los Angeles. In L.A. where “everything smells like acetone and Errol Flynn” Magdalena attempts to reinvent herself as a geographically appropriate bombshell—with rhinestones, silicone and gin—as she seeks an escape from her unraveling marriage and the traumatic death of her younger brother, Junah.
Magdalena’s Los Angeles is glitzy and glamorous but also a landscape of the absurd. Her languidly lyrical voice provides a travel guide for a city of make-believe, where even Hollywood insiders feel left out.
I wrote the following earlier this week, but, unfortunately, it looks like it was never posted:
I can’t thank all of you enough for your generous time and willingness to share your professional and wise insight regarding professionalism, age & gender. I recognize that you have no obligation to read this let alone take the time to write such helpful advice. I’m overwhelmed by your support and connection. The lack of clarity between professional men/women’s intentions can create confusion and frustration. Your insight serves everyone – irrespective of gender or other irrelevant classification. I speak for all who read and help write our blogs and sites – Thank you for your help. Social Media would be worthless if not for its ability to effectively and respectfully exchange valuable ideas and perspectives with people…Most especially those who would never have had the “social wherewithal” to receive such helpful insight.
All the best, 3P & associates.
Deb Babbit (@DebBabbit)
RongHua Ching (@Asiabroadcast)
Seth Carginolo (@carge77)
Laura Hunt (@LauraHuntStyle)
Sally Hanan (@inksnatcher)
…and others who continue to read and provide feedback.